Don't drink water, fishes have sex in it! :D
Save a tree, eat a beaver
Quitting smoking is easy, I've done it a hundred times
Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts
If it is tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
When cows laugh, does milk come out of their nose?
The easiest way to avoid a hangover is to just stay drunk
I'm not an alcoholic. I am a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings
Buy land, they have quit making it!
Don't judge a man by his boxers, it's what's inside that counts
I Don’t Like The Drugs, But The Drugs Like Me
If your name was homework, I'd be doing you on my desk right now...
Life's a bitch. Be its pimp
I'm better than normal, I'm abnormal!
By the time you read this, you've already read it
If you hate me, i love you too. It ain't my fault i'm better than you
Save a horse, ride a Cowboy!
The higher you are, the farther you fall
When life hands you a lemon, break out the tequila and the salt!
I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot
Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but milk do?
Smile and the world smiles with you. Fart and you stand alone
Trying is the first step towards failure
I don't have to be careful, I've got a gun

Tegelmuren :D
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